Articles
We Are Family
Way back in the dark ages, 1979 to be precise, Sister Sledge released a hit song entitled We Are Family. The disco tune was adopted by the Pittsburgh Pirates as their theme song, and it helped unify them as a team in winning the World Series.
Mike Easler, a member of that team, said, “We just treated each other like … brothers. All of us got along and if you didn’t get along with somebody, Willie (Stargell) made sure you got along … We had guys from Panama, black players from the ‘hood, white players from the ‘hood; we had all kinds of socioeconomic backgrounds. I think Willie Stargell’s presence and leader-ship held all that together” (Trib Live, 10/17/19).
It is impossible to overstate the importance of unity and group commitment to any joint endeavor: sports, a company, a scientific endeavor (viz., a moon landing), warfare, etc. Destroy cohesion, compromise mutuality, distract from common goals or otherwise impair good will and selfless sacrifice and the integrity of the group will be damaged or even destroyed.
[As I finished writing the above paragraph a brother emailed concerning the congregation that he is part of. He said, “There have been several issues which have caused members to move away including [a certain change – jj] which again was a consequence of Covid-19. Had we not made the change it is likely that some would have left anyway. It does make me wonder about the future of the group …”.]
It is no secret that the Covid pandemic is a real threat to congregations of the Lord’s people globally, even here at Centreville. Overall, we are a good, strong group, but we are not immune to the pressures and stresses that Covid is placing upon everyone.
So what are some potential troubles that a crisis like Covid can raise?
1. Attacks on the leadership. Elders everywhere have had to make very difficult decisions regarding worship assemblies, classes, health protocols, alternative methods of doing nearly everything. Often changing just one element of congregational life (altering worship time, for example) is traumatic and fodder for controversy, so consider the volatility of changing nearly everything – and doing so repeatedly – as the crisis morphed throughout 2020. The elders here have enjoyed support and encouragement from many, so this observation is not intended to be remedial. But we must remain on guard against what is a natural human tendency.
2. Differing opinions. Opinions on Covid cover the spectrum – legitimacy, politicization, prevention, future immunization, etc. Those opinions can be very strong due to the fact that the pandemic presents such serious concerns. In leading a congregation, elders make judgments based on specific scriptural principle as well as practical applications. Other leaders (families/businesses) have had to make similar decisions, and it is impossible to please everyone.
3. Separation. We are separated by anxiety, masks, distance, reduced socialization, lack of physical touch – and in some cases outright quarantine and prolonged absence from worship. These physical and emotional barriers are dangerous, for godly intimacy, sharing, conversation and time spent with each other are strengthening agents. When removed or compromised, relationships can weaken. The danger is filling the vacuum with something spiritually unhealthy.
4. Disruption of study. Zoom, YouTube, Skype, etc. all have their place, but they are poor substitutes for face-to-face interaction. The learning process is more than dry imparting of information. It is most effectively done when we are together, comfortably sharing thoughts and emotions generated by scripture. Of particular concern is the training of our children both in knowledge and in the benefits of joint class time. While the home is to be the principle source of instruction and application, the input of others and the structure of class time, lessons and accountability play an important role as well.
So, these and other threats are obvious, yet here we are with no definite end in sight. What can help us weather the storm that yet lies ahead?
1. Speak encouragement. “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers” (Eph 4:29). Criticism and complaints have a way of undermining the spirit and poisoning the atmosphere. They can also become chronic. We all feel the need to gripe a bit now and then, but we need to ask ourselves what impact our negativity may have on others. Take the high road; build morale; speak hope and optimism.
2. Try to understand differing views. This is a dying art in our society. We are living through a time of polarization, harsh judgments and crude dismissal of others. Those who are insecure an defensive cannot tolerate disparity because they don’t know how to articulate and defend their views. But Covid evokes such widely disparate opinions, some legitimate, some exaggerated, others irrational. So learn to ask: Why is this important to others? What is the source of my friend’s worry? Their concerns may not be mine, but we can try to see where they are coming from.
3. Give room for conscientious decisions. “One person esteems one day above another; another esteems every day alike. Let each be fully convinced in his own mind” (Rom 14:5). Relative to the pandemic, the elders have made various statements, both public and private, aimed at honoring each individual’s right to answer to his/her own conscience. We have avoided forced conformity in sensitive, personal judgments. In some matters we have stated a differing view but left it to the individuals involved to make their own choice before God. While we will not countenance blatant disobedience to God, we do intend to allow each one to exercise their faith in questions of priority and prudence.
4. We are family. Above all, let each of us determine to not allow Covid or anything else to turn us against each other. If you find yourself at odds with the elders or others in the congregation, consider whether the issue is a vital matter of doctrine or fellowship or merely one of personal judgment. Do I have my brother/sister’s best interest at heart? Am I trying to foster camaraderie and unity in a difficult time, or am I seeking to impose my own preferences on others? Pray for our unity and love at Centreville.
